Psychological-Thrillers Featuring ‘White People Problems’ That Make Black People Say, ‘Hell, That Wouldn’t Be Me’

Need a good holiday thriller that doesn’t feature Black people dying: Check out ‘Speak No Evil’ ‘Ponypool’ and more films where we are not going through it.

Let’s face it… Black life is often like a psychological thriller. People lie in our faces, team up against us, call us out our names and killing us for no reason. Bad things do happen to us, which is why we get annoyed by all those “Black struggle” films. In reality, we always make it through but do we really have to be reminded of the dark side? Aside from the annoying Black struggle films, being Black in any movie, especially in a thriller is never a good thing and it never shows our super powerful skill to survive: We die first, can’t outrun the slowest zombie and we are rarely the hero.

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Two alligators bang on a door at a Florida home and social media is going crazy

In fact, movies don’t spread the wealth to showcase fear and struggle within white America. But lately, our white brothers and sisters have been going through it in these mind-bending thrillers. And to be honest, that gives us a mental break. So if you are looking for some great movies this holiday, but ones where Black people are not in imminent danger, than look no further. Sit back and relax and get ready to say ‘That could never have been me.”

“Speak No Evil”

Starting off with a recent release, “Speak No Evil” depicts an American family visiting a British family’s estate. Only to learn more about the horrific nature of the owners. All we have to say is Black folks would have never allowed this disrespect.

“Pontypool”

A disc jockey learns about the recent reports of a zombie apocalypse in Pontypool, Ontario. Main character, Grant Mazzy, locks himself in his radio booth and races against time to warn the rest of the world about the zombifying virus. An amazing movie, but believe us Black folks would have known something was up immediately.

“The Substance”

After an aerobics show host is fired, she makes a drastic move. In an attempt to maintain her youth, she does something so wild and crazy, but it comes at a cost. People swear Demi Moore will get a Oscar for this, but all we got to say is Demi looked far better than her younger self, so it was all for nothing.

“Caddo Lake”

A broken family realizes the true nature of their past after a young girl mysteriously vanishes from their town. This mind-bending movie will have you at the edge of your seat.

“Handling The Undead”

Three families’ fate becomes intertwined after their deceased loved ones come alive in Oslo. This movie explores the intricacies of death, grief and learning to let go. We can only say this. Sad and scary. You gotta see it to believe it.

“Hereditary”

After the death of main character, Annie’s, mentally ill mother, unleashes a terrifying chain of events that was handed-down to the rest of the family. This movie will freak you out and make you wish you were in a Black struggle movie.

“Heretic”

This A24 horror film follows two young, female missionaries that stumble upon a man by the name of Mr. Reed. As they enter his home, they fight for their lives to escape his sadistic games. First of all, Black parents teach their kids not to be going over no strangers house. Regardless, Hugh did his thing in this film.

“Knock Knock”

Keanu Reeves stars as an architect targeted in a seductive, yet sadistic game by two young girls. Later on, their true agenda is discovered. We love Keanu Reeves and we don’t appreciate no one messing with our boy.

“The Man In The White Van”

In 1970s Florida, a young girl begins to be stalked by a man in a strange white van. As the stalking intensifies, the young girl becomes more aware of the danger she truly is in. The events are loosely based on infamous serial killer Billy Mansfield Jr.

“Single White Female”

After main character, Allison Jones, breaks up with her boo she welcomes in a new roommate, Hedra Carlson. At first, they hit it off. But time soon tells Allison the violent nature of her new friend. This is an oldie but goodie. The film is still stylish and very New York City. Allison needed some Black girl friends to tell her “Girl, that is not your friend.”

“The Strangers”

This 2008 thriller follows a couple looking to enjoy a getaway at a family vacation home. Things quickly take a turn when three masked intruders torment the couple and their friends for the rest of the night. See…time that weird person knocked on the door, we would have known to bolt.

“The Roommate”

Similar to “Single White Female,” newly arrived college student, Sara takes on Los Angeles with her assigned roommate, Rebecca. After the two form a bond, three becomes a crowd after Sara meets and moves in with her boyfriend. Later, things take a turn for the worst.

“Black Swan”

A New York City ballet dancer grapples with the balance of reality after becoming the star of an opening production of “Swan Lake.” Great film, but we knew where this was headed.

“You’re Next”

An estranged upperclass, wealthy family are the targets of a murder plot where they have to put their personal issues to the side in order to survive. Sometimes it’s not good to be part o the upperclass, eh?

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