What Men Want When They Talk Submission

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The Root's contributing editor Demetria L. Lucas, writing at Clutch magazine, asks whether something is "getting lost in interpretation between the language of Venus and Mars" when we talk about what it means to submit.

Last week, I wrote about a cartoon that idolizes Black women from yesteryear and craps on modern Black women. One of the uplifted qualities of the 70s woman was "knows that she has more power being submissive to her a man." Unsurprisingly, many commenters latched onto the idea of submission and rallied against it.

"Submission" has become some sort of weird buzzword. The second a guy — always a guy — throws it into a conversation as a desirable trait, you can bet good money that an argument is about to ensue. It's an exasperating conversation that women go ape s#@! over. We hear men say it and most of us envision a man wanting a woman akin to Vanessa Bell Calloway's character in "Coming to America", the type of woman who answers every question with "whatever you like" and will hop on one foot while barking like a dog — a big dog, if necessary — to please her man. Just the idea of it is enough to make many of us black out as we tough type an enraged response. As much as we try to convince and cajole guys to an enlightened perspective, they rarely budge. Maybe men are just that pigheaded. Or maybe something's getting lost in interpretation between the language of Venus and Mars.

Read Demetria L. Lucas' entire piece at Clutch magazine.

The Root aims to foster and advance conversations about issues relevant to the black Diaspora by presenting a variety of opinions from all perspectives, whether or not those opinions are shared by our editorial staff.

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