We have watched and listened for the human mountains! We have watched with lust as your thigh meat advancements have been overseen by The Root staff, who scoffs at having chill. And now you want to hand over this thirst trap to the world, which could not keep its own thirst contained. We will have it. I said, we will have it, oh!
(Writer’s Note: Shouts to staff writer Anne Branigin for the heavy (heh) headline assist!)
Winston Duke happened, y’all. That’s it. That’s the lede.
Case in point: Winston’s recent workout video.
As Captain of Team Thighmeats, I wholeheartedly appreciate and support this display of work. Y’all gon’ get this work.
If you take a look at the comments under his Instagram post, folks were entirely enthused for this type of work, indeed.
Remember this classic tweet?
It applies since Winston is doing well-formed squats so he won’t blow out his back. And of course, those thighmeats are the reward for his hard work. A reward for him; a bigger reward for us.
Hell, even Jordan Peele (and his cinematographer Mike Gioulakis) knew to showcase Duke’s assets. Y’all saw that shot in Us (a movie of which, our managing editor of The Glow Up, Maiysha Kai informed me, is already out on Amazon Prime!) The one on the tiny beach house bed. Yes. We stan a well-framed shot.
Sir Duke (Yes, I just knighted him. Sir Duke of Thighmeaton) is a treasure. Anyone who has had the pleasure of existing in his circumference (hey, Contributing Editor, Angela Helm!) can attest to the fact that he somehow has the power to make you burst into a full-cheesing smile. Stand next to Winston? You are showing all of your teeth.
For example, take the exact moment on the 2019 NAACP Image Awards red carpet when Winston said he remembered me after I interviewed him for the Us press junket. It was then that I ascended to heaven. Look how tiny I am next to him. Why yes, I will take this particular Mt. Everest climbing challenge.
Ahem. Focus.
Focus on Winston Duke’s workout that is. Enjoy!