Trump Now Wants to Put His Wall on a Layaway Plan

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President Trump is becoming desperate, so desperate that he’s now willing to put funding for his border wall on a pay-as-you-go plan.

On Thursday, lawmakers shot down two dueling proposals to reopen the government. A Republican-backed proposal sought to have the full $5.7 billion for the wall and a Democrat-sponsored proposal sought to reopen the government until Feb. 8 while the two sides continued to argue on funding for the southern border wall that will keep out all of the imaginary villains who come into America carrying satchels of drugs and chaos. Both plans failed spectacularly.

Shortly after the votes, the Devil’s Mouthpiece, aka Sarah Huckabee Sanders, aka Suckabee, issued a statement noting that the president would be willing to consider the Democrats’ proposal as long as it included some money for his wall.

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Trump suggested to reporters on Thursday that one of the ideas he’s heard being tossed around Congress is a “prorated down payment” for a border wall.

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“One of the ideas suggested is they open it, they pay some sort of prorated down payment for the wall, which, I think people would agree, you need,” he said, CNN reports.

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So, now Trump is willing to take partial payments for the wall that only he wants.

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, aka 1997 Suge Knight (before he got knocked out by that barber and before he went to prison for murder and his eyes went bad), told the president, “nah, son.”

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“The president just said that if they come to a reasonable agreement he will support it,” Pelosi said. “I hope it doesn’t mean some big down payment for the wall.”

Asked again about a potential down payment, she said: “That is not a reasonable agreement between the senators,” CNN reports.

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The Root has obtained exclusive footage of Trump negotiating money for his border wall.

Republican Sen. Lindsey Graham of South Carolina, who has been suffering from tightness in his joints after morphing from a grown man into Trump’s lapdog, shockingly supports the president’s idea of a “down payment.”

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In a statement viewed by CNN, Graham said, “The way forward is clear to me: a three-week continuing resolution that includes a down payment on wall/barrier funding and priorities of Democrats for disaster relief, showing good faith from both sides.”

Pelosi wasn’t the only Democrat cool on the idea of paying a partial ransom for the government wage hostage crisis created by the president over a wall no one wants.

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Sen. Debbie Stabenow of Michigan, noted that she doesn’t like the idea of hostage politics.

“What does he hold workers’ wages hostage for next? How many times will he try to hold wages hostage?” the senator asked.

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Sen. Angus King, a Maine independent who caucuses with Senate Democrats, said: “He is basically saying, ‘Give me what I want — or give me part of what I want — or I’ll shut the government down.’ ... I don’t like rewarding shutdown politics,” CNN reports.

The president still believes that he has leverage here and he doesn’t. Asking for a partial payment for the wall is begging and, at this point, he may have just tipped his hand. The government shutdown is a bad look for Republicans and even the short-sighted president knows this. Trump has negotiated himself into a corner that he can’t catchphrase his way out of. Trump might as well walk into the Senate and ask if he can get on a Rent-To-Own plan where he can take the wall home now and agree to keep it in plastic while Congress pays on it a little each month.