Trump Is So Jealous of Dr. Anthony Fauci That He Lied About Throwing Out the Yankees' First Pitch

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Inviting Dr. Anthony Fauci to throw out the first pitch to start the Major League Baseball season was a totally “fuck you” to the president.

Dr. Fauci hasn’t just been the thorn in the side of the Trump administration’s COVID-19 response; he’s been the only adult voice advocating for common sense since the beginning. This might be because Dr. Anthony Fauci is the nation’s leading infectious disease doctor and not the president, whose medical bona fides include sleeping at a Holiday Inn Express.

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So, having Trump’s biggest critic of his handling of the spread of the coronavirus (and by “biggest critic,” I mean that Dr. Fauci continuously points to science) throw out the first pitch for the Washington Nationals during the coronavirus baseball season was a giant “fuck you” to the president and his inept administration.

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So what did the president do?

Well, he lied about being asked to throw out the first pitch at a New York Yankees game because he’s a seventh-grader who doesn’t have a girlfriend, so he made up one that goes to another school.

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Trump claimed that he was asked to throw out the Aug. 15 first pitch, which would have the Yankees up against rivals the Boston Red Sox.

It turns out that the whole thing was bullshit—or at least, the Yankees didn’t know what the fuck he was talking about.

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From the New York Times report, published Monday.

“There was one problem: Mr. Trump had not actually been invited on that day by the Yankees, according to one person with knowledge of Mr. Trump’s schedule. His announcement surprised both Yankees officials and the White House staff.”

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Trump claimed that Yankees president Randy Levine, a longtime Trump supporter, asked him personally to throw the pitch.

“Randy Levine, he’s a great friend of mine from the Yankees,” Trump said on Thursday, taking a break from discussing our national and global health crisis. “He asked me to throw out the first pitch. And I think I’m doing that on Aug. 15 at Yankees Stadium.”

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Yahoo Sports noted that some 90 minutes after Trump’s bogus claim, “Fauci tossed out the ill-fated first pitch that landed short and left of home plate to open the MLB season.”

And get this: Dr. Fauci is currently out here killing the baseball card game:

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The Times notes that Trump’s fragile-ass ego couldn’t handle that the baseball season started in Washington, D.C. and he wasn’t asked to throw out the first pitch.

From the Times report:

“But Mr. Trump had been so annoyed by Dr. Fauci’s turn in the limelight, an official familiar with his reaction said, that he had directed his aides to call Yankees officials and make good on a longtime standing offer from Mr. Levine to throw out an opening pitch. No date was ever finalized.”

Alas, the Yankees were not forced to scramble to accommodate the president. On Sunday, Trump announced that he in fact would not throw out the first pitch on Aug. 15 while vowing to “make it later in the season!”

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He ain’t finna do shit but lie. He’s already acting like he’s too busy to throw out the pitch that no one asked him to throw.

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