In a piece that explores the world of childless couples at Ebony, Josie Pickens says that unlike people who have doubts but have children anyway, childless couples are happy because they are forging their own way and living life on their terms.
Lisa and Evan are happily planning a life together. It's the cutest thing ever. Lisa (30) and Evan (33) want to travel extensively, live abroad, engulf themselves in community art projects, and build a beautifully modern home that Evan—an architect—drew plans for himself. In that dream home, Lisa, whose passion is fashion design, will have her own studio space to draw and sew and flip through her favorite magazines.
Admittedly, when I feel weary about the state of Black love, I call Lisa and ask about their wedding and life plans. She was also the first person I called when I read about the cover of the newest edition of Time magazine. Much to the dismay of everyone around them, Lisa and Evan plan to remain childless after they marry.
"I only wanted dolls growing up so I could dress them prettily," Lisa surrendered as we sat for cocktails and girl talk—half laughing, half wincing and hoping I wouldn't judge her. Of course I didn't judge. As a single mother and a feminist, I don't at all believe that mother and woman are synonymous. I have a clear understanding of how one's life changes after children. Therefore, I'm always encouraging women to be thoughtful before they take the plunge into parenthood.
Read Josie Pickens' entire piece at Ebony.
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Josie Pickens is an educator, culture critic and griot whose work focuses primarily on race and gender. Follow her musings on Twitter.