Before we begin, can anyone explain this Obamagate stuff that the Trump Administration pushing?
First of all, why does adding “gate” to the end of a word make it a scandal? The Nixon Administration was undone by a break-in at the Watergate Hotel and since then, white people just lazily started adding “gate” to random words to demonize it. It doesn’t mean anything.
That’s probably why this woman at the Faux News Network quickly went to commercial when a lawyer started telling the truth.
Maybe these tweets explain it:
I’m sad because of this missed opportunity. This headline should have read:
“Cunning Genius Insists on Cunnilingus During Carnal Evening”
I don’t know who posted this, but they are wrong.
Everyone knows this is the meme of the year:
Who would’ve thought that MJ would have a second Hall-of-Fame career in the meme industry?
This is is funny:
But it still doesn’t top my thread about my encounter with a celebrity:
Warning: if you watch this video, you will never be able to eat at a buffet again.
I’m thinking about standing in the kitchen and watching them cook my food from now on.
There is absolutely NOTHING funnier than a Dr. Umar meme.
Usually, my go-to is the Out-of-Context-Umar Twitter account, but this one is hilarious.
Also, congratulations.
This is also how I feel about outside in general.
Those McDonald’s fries do be bussin’, though. And I know you’re gonna say they’re not as good as they used to be, but that’s your fault. You probably eat McDonald’s when you’re sober. Everyone knows the only time to eat McDonald’s is at 3 a.m. when you’re too drunk for Waffle House and too hungry to just go home.
Basically, McNuggets taste their best when you’re feeling like this:
She’s probably gonna be a McNugget ingredient soon.
You wanna see what white privilege looks like?
I think white people are just trolling us now. I don’t even think they’re protesting anymore. I think they’re just trying to find ways to get out of the house and do the fun shit they would be doing if they weren’t under stay-at-home orders.
I bet they were at home until someone said: “Hey Bubba, whatcha doing today?”
“I don’t know Other Bubba, ( In my head, all white dudes are nicknamed Bubba. It’s like Karen for rednecks) I’m ready to get out of the house but I can’t go nowhere. I would like to go try out my new rocket launcher but I don’t want to break the law.”
And then first bubba was like: “say no more.”
I’m pretty sure that’s how these “Open up the Economy” protests start.
Here’s what Umar would’ve told those gun-toting thugs:
And just in case you need a pick-me-up, here’s one of the greatest: