Social Studies: May 13, 2020

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One day in the future, just before we head out into the post-apocalyptic dystopian landscape to forage for food, we’re probably going to look back at this administration and wonder what the hell was wrong with us. We’ve just gotten used to his antics.

I know, I know—there’s just too much Trump malfeasance to get upset about it all, especially when you also have to worry about being lynched while jogging, catching the ’Rona, Republicans stealing your vote, global warming and Face ID not working with your mask on.

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Does anyone remember my passcode? I know it had an 8 in the middle.

Oh, wait... We were talking about Donald Trump.

Anyway, Russia’s at it again:

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The Trump administration also forced Mississippi to count CARES Acts payments as unearned income, which means that many people won’t be eligible for food stamps.

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That’s right, $600 per week means you’re too rich for government assistance. Of course, you have to find a way to stop people from abusing the system. No one wants welfare queens living off their dime. I get tired of these...

Oh, wait:

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Someone at The Guardian wrote a whole article about being named Karen. I bet the writer told them she was “the manager.”

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Angry Karens are my favorite Karens and here is the realest Karen you ever saw. She’s the Tupac of Karens.

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First of all, I’m lactose intolerant so I wouldn’t know, but are cheddar bay biscuits really that good? As a proud South Carolinian, we hold Red Lobster in the same esteem that Italians regard Olive Garden.

The only red lobster we acknowledge is Sebastian.


Meanwhile, as COVID-19 continues to disproportionately affect black and brown communities, people are searching for solutions by any means necessary, including Facebook:

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Well, actually...the black nurses who are risking their lives on the front lines are both.

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By the way, has anyone recognized this strange phenomenon?

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I love the elders, lawd knows I do. But is Stef Curry fine?

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This is both disturbing and accurate. I love these deep fakes.

I bet the baby reads at a higher level than Donald, though.

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Does anyone remember that we have an election coming up?

And where is Joe Biden? If Joe really wants to be president, he’s probably gonna have to risk it all and get out and start campaigning. This ad is pretty good, but they ain’t showing this long shit on Fox News.

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What I’m trying to say is that we’re doomed. If the ‘Rona doesn’t kill us, Trump will.

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And even if he doesn’t Karens are going to make you wish you were dead.

Maybe this will make you happy:

Happy Birthday, Stevie Wonder!