Quincy Jones Is Probably Shooting Dust but Doesn’t Want to Date ‘Old,’ ‘Fat’ Women

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It must be nice to be geriatric and rich. In the case of Quincy Jones, the 84-year-old proudly brags about the bevy of young women across the country who get to massage his shrinkled-up balls.

In an interview with GQ, Jones basically took a cue from Ludacris and talked about all of his hos women in different area codes time zones. The 22 women, who he said range in age from 28 to 42 (and are younger than his daughters), are located across the globe.

“[I got] girlfriends everywhere. Cape Town. Cairo. Stockholm—she’s coming in next week. Brazil—Belo Horizonte, Sao Paulo and Rio. Shanghai—got a great girl over there from Shanghai, man. Cairo, whew,” Jones bragged.

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So, what could these women possibly see in Jones? Wait, I’m sure it’s true love. Yeah, they’re loving that bank account. But dating younger women is nothing new to Jones. When Jones was 41, he married 28-year-old Peggy Lipton, and he dated Nastassja Kinski when she was 31 and he was 59.

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But don’t you dare think you’ll ever catch Jones cavorting with his fellow elderly woman. He ain’t got time for his own age group.

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“There’s nothing ... there’s no upside [to dating a woman my age],” Jones stated. “You gotta be kidding. I got me some technology out there ... keep fat and old away from here. Buzzes if they’re too old. But you’d be surprised. ... These women, the young ones, are aggressive now. Oh my God, they’re fearless, man. All over the world.”

Technology? What exactly is this technology of which he’s speaking? Last time I checked, Viagra didn’t come with Bluetooth.