After an audio recording surfaced of a Michigan city’s mayor using a derogatory term for homosexuals, the official has denied that the voice on the recording is his, failing to explain why tapes keep popping up of him using racist and homophobic slurs.
Jim Fouts, mayor of Warren, Mi., and survivor of two zombie apocalypses, told the Detroit Free Press that a new recording of him referring to gays as “fags” was “phony” and “manipulated.” The new tape, obtained by Deadline Detroit, boasts a man whose voice is eerily similar to Fouts’, saying:
“[This] is personal to me, just like being a ‘fag’ is personal to somebody, being fat is personal to somebody, being a, uh, a dimwit is personal to somebody. That is personal to me. It is very - it’s like I’ve been raped, like I’ve been accosted...”
“I was a sent a copy of it, and it’s clearly more of the same,”Fouts said of the new tape. “It’s another phony, manipulated, manufactured, out-of-context—it’s just a phony tape.”
And if you’re wondering why I keep referring to this as the “new tape,” it’s because, waaay back in 2017, a recording emerged of a man who sounded a lot like Fouts using the n-word and explaining how black people look like chimpanzees. Fouts also claimed that audio was “engineered.”
That was after audio surfaced of a man who was also Fouts—or possibly a Fouts impersonator—referring to disabled people as “retards,” according to Fox 2. Fouts, speaking through the lid of his daylight hours casket, said that was a fake tape, too.
There is also another tape of the mayor saying:
“You think I want to date a fucking 60-year-old hag? Fuck that shit. I’m not interested in any old ugly hag. I think after a certain age, they’re all dried up, washed up, burned up. They are pussies when they are young, and when they get older, they’re just mean, hateful dried-up cunts”
Fouts acknowledged that was actually his voice on that particular recording.
I’m just bullshitting. He once again said that wasn’t him, leading one to wonder why the hell does this reanimated mummy keep talking around recording devices? Can’t he text or write emails? Or–and I know this might sound outrageous–maybe he could stop being so hateful?
I know they didn’t have this kind of technology when Fouts grew up during the Pleistocene era. Plus, back in his day, politicians didn’t have to worry about people recording them—although one of his high school classmates, Julius Caesar, was the subject of terrible political opposition. Maybe Fouts is just old and racist; or, as white people call it: “He’s just set in his ways.”
It must be noted, however, that Fouts is a liar. For years, the 76-year-old shaved 2 years off his age, even refusing to fill out the birth date portion of his election paperwork.
The skeletal remains of a once-decent man named Jim Fouts claimed that the tapes are just an attempt to unseat him before his reelection bid. He would have been out of office in 2019 because of the city’s term limits. But in 2016, Fouts orchestrated a change to the city’s charter that allowed him to serve two more four-year terms, totaling 20 potential years as mayor, an office he has held since 2007, when he was elected after serving on the city council for 26 years.
When asked for comment, Satan said that, although they received the same training, he didn’t know Fouts that well, explaining: “He was two years ahead of me in devil school.”