Melania Trump Moves Into the White House; Hopefully She Can Bring the Old Man Home With Her

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Melania Trump has the distinction of being the first first lady who’s posed before the world with her hand over her naked vagina. President Donald Trump is the first president to be caught on tape saying he grabs women “by the pussy.” I see why they love each other.

This weekend, Trump’s wife stopped costing taxpayers a gazillion dollars in protection costs by moving herself and little Barron, her and the president’s son, into the White House. I’m sure that Melania has stipulations, like having her own room and private phone line so she can talk to the man she no doubt dates in New York. In turn, she will act as if she and the president are together and continue to get her monthly allowance.

According to NBC News, the first lady had been preparing a secret tunnel to escape to see her boyfriend the residence since April and was looking for a school for Barron.

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Melania and Barron arrived at the White House on Sunday, with Barron wearing a graphic T-shirt (uggh, I hate graphic tees) emblazoned with the words “The Expert,” which he reportedly stole from Papa Bannon.

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Hopefully their stay will be a short one and she can take the old man home with her.

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Read more at NBC News.