Lawmaker Stricken By Rare, Selective Amnesia That Makes Her Forget Saying the N-Word in Front of Black Colleagues

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It happens to us all. Even the smartest people have momentary lapses of memory when they misplace the car keys; can’t recall if they unplugged the iron or forget when they called a majority black county the n-word in public.

Well, that’s what happened to Maryland Democrat Mary Ann Lisanti, who, according to the Washington Post, apologized to the state’s Legislative Black Caucus for allegedly calling 65 percent-black Prince George’s County a “nigger district,” even though Lisanti says she doesn’t recall saying it.

“I am sickened that a word that is not in my vocabulary came out of my mouth,” Lisanti said in a statement a few weeks ago. “It does not represent my belief system, my life’s work or what is my heart.”

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This always happens to me. I apologize for shit I didn’t do all the time. I’m still salty about not being asked to host the Oscars even though, unlike Kevin Hart, I apologized for being mean to Rihanna when she asked me out on a date. Like Lisanti, Khaleesi of cuss words, I also don’t understand why anyone would believe that the words actually coming out of someone’s mouth represented them in any way. It is patently unfair.

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Lisanti, who represents 85 percent-white Harford, Md., reportedly used the slur in front of a racially mixed group of lawmakers while having a few drinks at an Annapolis, Md., cigar bar. She was allegedly talking to a white colleague and told him that campaigning in PG County was door-knocking in the “nigger district.”

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The group didn’t include Del. Sheree Sample-Hughes, who left before any n-bombs were thrown, apparently aware of what happens when Caucasians start partaking in high-end whiskey while smoking Wypipo blunts. Sample-Hughes did, however, called the slur “disheartening and frustrating.”

The Post reports:

Questioned by The Washington Post earlier this month about her alleged use of the racial slur, Lisanti said: “I don’t recall that . . . I don’t recall much of that evening.”

When asked whether she has ever used the slur, she said: “I’m sure I have . . . I’m sure everyone has used it. I’ve used the f-word. I used the Lord’s name in vain.”

Sample-Hughes said Monday night that she wondered why Lisanti seemed comfortable with the word and asked during the meeting if Lisanti grew up in a household where the word was used. “She didn’t give a direct response,” Sample-Hughes said.

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Lisante noted that in her —

Wait ... Did she just say she’s sure everyone has used the n-word? You know that means that she only hangs around people who use the n-word because she says she’s sure of it like I’m sure everyone inhales, breathes, shits and eats fried chicken. I also use the word “motherfucker” a lot.

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I mean, a whole lot.

But not so often that I believe everyone has used it. I bet Santa Claus doesn’t call Rudolph a “red-nosed motherfucking reindeer.” Even if I’m smoking a Black & Mild while drinking Champale, I wouldn’t use the word motherfucker in church or around my grandmother (I usually sit in the non-smoking section at my church, but you catch my drift).

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And some people don’t use the n-word. I’m definitely sure of that. I bet Rachel Maddow doesn’t use it. Or Steve Kerr. In fact, you know who invented the phrase “the n-word?”

MOTHERFUCKERS WHO DON’T USE THE N-WORD!

Rep. Jay Walker, who is black, says he was standing right there when Lisanti used the word, but what do you do when white people start slinging the n-word around like they’re at a Klan meeting or the White House? Well, Walker said he “addressed it with her privately.”

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Also, even though I don’t remember it, I would like to apologize to Taylor Swift, Michael Rapaport and all the white people I slandered by referring to them as “white people.”

It does not represent my belief system, my life’s work or what is my heart.

“I think you feel like, especially as a person of color and a black woman in the House, you want to feel like your colleagues respect you, that you can work together,” Wanika Fisher, who actually represents Prince George’s County in the Maryland House of Delegates, told The Root.

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“And when people make degrading comments, whether it’s in a social setting or not, you want to know the legislation and the things you’re bringing are being respected. And I think that’s what’s quite disturbing about it,” Fisher added. “If an elected official can say that, imagine what’s happening on the streets of Maryland.”

Asked if she believed Lisanti was “sickened” by the word that is not in her vocabulary, as Listanti alleges, Fisher replied: “No. When you have a problem, the first step is to admit you have a problem.”

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See? Everything’s ok. There is no problem.

Now please excuse me while I email Mary Ann Lisanti to see if she’d like to get out of “nigger county” and do some campaigning here.