It's Confirmed: Bad-Ass, Kick-Ass Black Female Lawyers Won 2015

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As much of the country — including, even, school crossing guards — seems to be engaged in an "Oh How I Hate Muslims" pissing contest, it would be understandable for America's HLIC (head lawyer in charge) to offer something superficially platitudinal about that religion; acknowledging that America is land of the free and home of the brave and shit and we're all free to practice what we believe. It wouldn't even be the least politically prudent strategy to offer some ambivalence. "Maybe Muslims aren't inherently bad," she might say, but "but it's understandable how an American could come to feel this way." Of course, this would be pandering, dog-whistling, and dangerous, but we've all heard worse from elected and appointed officials.

Instead, last week Loretta Lynch appeared at the Muslim Advocates 10th anniversary dinner — a bold act in itself — and said the following:

"The Muslim community is expanding, and it is beautiful."

Which, effectively, translates to "Bigots, please shut the fuck up."

Of course, for those familiar with Lynch and her politics, this wasn't a surprise. It also wouldn't be a stretch to assume that Lynch has experienced some race-based and gender-based discrimination in her career; and that these experiences have helped make her particularly and specifically qualified to fight for fairness and against injustice. Which could also be said for any lawyer who happens to be Black and happens to be a woman. Which, considering the racially and politically antagonistic year we've just had, is perhaps why the bad-ass, kick-ass Black female lawyer won 2015.

Along with Lynch, you have Marilyn Mosby, the State's Attorney for Baltimore; a woman who currently has the highest approval rating in the Black community since 2014 Lupita Nyong'o and 1819 Denmark Vecsy. And National Basketball Players Association executive director Michele Roberts, who has established that she is not fucking around with your bitch ass. Even the single most compelling character on television today — Viola Davis's "Annalise Keating" — is a lawyer. A murderer and possible sociopath too, but a bad-ass, kick-ass lawyer nonetheless. And the woman who might actually be the most famous Black woman in the world right now is also a lawyer. Of course, she's spending more time these days taking mean mug selfies with her husband than practicing law, but I'm sure if the Lawyer Avengers were ever to converge, she'd have no problem finding her cape and mask too. These five women are basically the Golden State Warriors' small-ball lineup; destroying worlds at historically dominant levels and forcing inefficient anachronisms from outdated eras (i.e.: Boehner, John; Bryant, Kobe, etc) to retire.

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Of course, there are countless others I could have named by name, but haven't. Included in that group are the dozens of young lawyers Panama and I met earlier this year, when the Harvard Black Law Students Association invited us to speak at their spring conference. Each of them brilliant, eager, and preternaturally motivated, giving me no doubt that the bad-ass, kick-ass Black female lawyer should be the favorites to win 2016 through 2026 too.