So…how many Black men want to be white? I know it’s not all. I’m sure it is not the majority. But we gotta ask the question. OK. Let me set some parameters. I am not saying everyone in any group is any one thing. Not all Black men want to be white. Nor do all white people enjoy the same privileges. Yet, we would have to admit that some Black men seem to behave in ways that resembles how White people move in the world.
White privilege is a thing. Much has been said about it, and, despite detractors, most have come to terms with the reality that it is something that governs the way people treat one another. For example, white mothers do not usually need to have conversations with their children about how to behave when the police pull them over. Black mothers do. Not all people who need skin tan lotion in the summer are wealthy, but there are clear economic disadvantages that come with being a descendent of people who were enslaved in this country. Yet, though Black men do not have access to the privilege white folks do, it sure seems that many of us move through life as though we did.
Clarence Thomas knows he is not white, but he certainly lives his life as though he his. Snoop Dogg may be everyone’s favorite Crip uncle, but we must look at his choices of late and wonder what’s going on with the guy. These are examples of men who know they are Black. Yet, the way they move makes you question if they are proud of the people they come from.
Some time ago, my dear friend and former writer for The Root Damon Young said (or wrote) with his chest on this platform, that straight Black men are the white people of Black people. He argued that Black men have privileges that Black women do not. He also argued that Black men pose a clear and real danger to the wellbeing of women in our community, and he was right.
We often engage in terrible behavior in romantic relationships that Black men are seldom called out on because, ultimately, most Black women are going to support us. Then there is the domestic violence that women in the Black community suffer at disproportionate rates compared to white women. Then there are rappers like Drake, Jay-Z and Nelly who make decisions that make me question their motives. Is it that Sean Carter wanted to help uplift Black folks when he partnered with the NFL? Or was it that he wanted access to power? A seat at the table previously only available to mostly rich white men?
This is what I mean when I wonder aloud if (some) Black want to be white. As much as I hate to admit it, I understand why more and more Black women are choosing to date white men. They outnumber Black men, and too many of us are more trouble than we are worth. Black men must come to terms with the uncomfortable truth that we may not be as bad to Black women as white folks have been to us, but we have not been very good to them either.