Every year, millions of Americans make well-intentioned New Year's resolutions to get their money straight.
"I'm going to get out of debt."
"I'm going to stick to a budget."
"I'm going to save more.
Too bad many of those declarations are broken before the end of January.
We have trouble keeping these promises because we don't look at what got us into trouble in the first place. But here's something you can take to the bank: Until you look at what's really behind your financial choices, you will fall back into the same old patterns again and again.
Moving from Resolution to Action: Know What You're Planning For!
The first step in any financial plan is to get a clear picture of what you're planning for. Desires like "I want to spend less" or "I want to save more" are short on specifics and rarely accompanied by a plan. You must be specific.
"I want to save $5,000 to start a business."
"I want to save an extra $200 a month to pay down my credit cards."
"I want to save $1,000 and take my family on a vacation."
These are all specific goals that we can work toward.
George Kinder, a financial planner and a Buddhist Monk, asks his clients to think about three scenarios as they try to determine their most important goals and priorities.
The first: You have all of the money you will ever need. Money will never again be a concern. What will you do with your life? Your time?
The second: You've just gone to the doctor, and you found out you have just five to 10 years to live? What will you do with the time you have remaining? What will your life look like? How are you spending your time?
In the final scenario, you've gone to the doctor and found out you will die tomorrow. The question is not what would you do on your final day, but what are your regrets? What did you not do in this precious life that is about to end?
As you think about these scenarios, look for the disconnects and inconsistencies in how you are spending your life, time and money.
In addition, come up with three goals for the year and figure out how much they will cost. Staying connected to your goals is one of the few things that will give you the motivation to stick to a financial plan.
What Knocks Us Off Course
There are three major influences behind our financial choices. Anywhere you see behavior that is not consistent with your goals and priorities, one of these factors is at work.
1. The lessons we learn as children: If you grew up in a house where, credit-card debt was acceptable or saving wasn't a priority, this is the model you bring to your adult behavior.
2. Social messages: Advertisers and peers tell us, "You must wear brand x." The financial industry tells us, "Minorities are financially illiterate." We saw how that became a self-fulfilling prophecy when minorities were targeted for subprime mortgages.
3. The way we perceive ourselves: "I'm the big spender." "I can't save money." "Investing is for the rich, not people like me."
We blindly play out these roles, and they cost us dearly.
Think about how these influences are at work in your own behavior. In addition, carry a notebook and write down everything you spend for a week. At the end of the week, go through each of your spending items and ask yourself the following questions:
1. Can I afford this?
2. Is it in line with my goals?
3. If not, why am I doing it?
Do the same with your monthly expenses. Places will jump out at you where you are spending in ways that are the result of these influences.
This awareness will give you a moment of pause before you spend. That's the moment in which we can make better decisions. Ask yourself how you would be behaving if you were living your ideal life with money?
A Plan of Action
Now that you're aware of what you want and some of the influences that have been standing in your way, you need to get to work.
Create a spending plan: A spending plan is not about deprivation. It's about channeling your resources toward what's truly important. List your income and your expenses on a spreadsheet. Be sure to put your goals right at the top.
Take baby steps: Identify places where you know you can cut back…Only put $100 a month on your credit card, instead of $200, for example. Set up an automatic payroll deduction. Don't do anything dramatic until you're ready.
Set a date: This prevents premature action or prolonged procrastination.
Create a plan to deal with temptation: Instead of going shopping after work, commit to something you've always wanted to do, like a yoga or exercise class.
Go public: You will need support from your friends and family. Tell them what you're trying to do. Give them permission to check up on you. Contact them in your moments of weakness.
Don't wait for that magic moment: "I'll start working on my resolution when things slow down." No one is going to swirl a wand a grant you the perfect opportunity to change your situation. Right now is always the best time to make your financial dreams a reality.
Stacey Tisdale is a veteran on-air financial journalist. She's the author of "The True Cost of Happiness: The Real Story Behind Managing Your Money." She is also a board member of nonprofit financial literacy organization, Operation HOPE.