Great article, really sets out what so many of us face (as well as your individual challenges).

Great article. Regarding your description of your parents, you might want to look up childhood emotional neglect (link). I learned about it a couple years ago and it’s been really helpful in understanding my relationship with my parents and how their parenting impacted me. 

I am the child of a woman and man who have several psychological issues, no education, no money and should not have had children. I’m happy to be alive, have two amazing children and have managed to avoid the pitfalls of their parenting but I can tell you life was not/is not easy. I started self-medicating at 15 to…

Thanks so much for writing this - I think you have and will touch a lot of women. I was right where you are but at the age of 45. Had suffered from depression on and off throughout my adult life but didn’t really get it under control until my 40s. I have dated on and off for years but, after being abused by my father…

I’m in the same boat at 41, fertility-wise and in completely lacking a parenting partner. I had a more useful gyno who, at my 35th birthday, began talking to me about “advanced maternal age” and egg-freezing and IVF options. I could have decided then to attempt a (likely fraught and expensive) pregnancy by myself, and…

I definitely related to the first part of this. For the past few years I’ve been trying to find the root cause of my lifelong singledom, and I can’t help but wonder if all the negative messages I received about dating as a kid from my parents have anything to do with it. I remember being in middle school and my mom…

Thank you so much for sharing your story. I’m 42 as well, and single, and struggling with the realization that children may no longer be an option for me. In my twenties, I did everything ‘right.’ I met the boy, I married the boy, I started on my path towards a career and a future that I thought would include…

I can relate 200%, including the depression. I just turned 46 and my childlessness excuse is that I saw what my elder sisters went through as single mothers—and I subsequently never found the appropriate partner/baby daddy. Wrote about this on my birthday: www.dragonflyness.com/46

I am mid 30s and running out the clock too. I have a feeling my uncertainty about kids is me stalling till I no longer have a choice in the matter. But damnit I refuse to rush into marriage and kids just to avoid regret later. I am waiting for the need and the drive like the way I’m driven by my career. Not to mention…

I appreciate you so much for this. I felt like I was reading my journal entry. I’m 42 also and struggled with depression for most of my 20s and 30s. I cancelled my wedding 5 months out but I’m sure if I had gone through with it, I’d be divorced by now. I feel like I’ve made peace with the fact that I may never have…

I feel for you so much. As a fellow bipolar depression/severe anxiety survivor, I can tell you, it’s not too much easier on the slightly younger end. I’m married and 33, wanting to try to get pregnant mid-next year (so well into 34), but I was supposed to be weaning off some of my heavier bipolar/anxiety/migraine meds…

I love your wig choices! Want that lavender one! Any suggestions for where to buy any/all of these?

When they opened Florida back up, the first three things I did was get my hair braided, and my nails and eyebrows done. Even the flyest folks were looking crazy. I tried a wig when i lived in Connecticut. It was a summer with record heat. I was sweating like a whore in church! NEVER AGAIN. It was hotter than a wool…

You are such a natural beauty with a great spirit. How have I overlooked these videos before?   *looks around for subscribe button*

Can I say that I adore your name necklace? 

“She could sew and she could crochet and she could clean to the point where you could safely eat off the floor, any floor, in our home.” Damn skippy.  If the house didn’t smell like bleach and/or Pine Sol erry Saturday morning, I would not have known where I was, but it wasn’t my mama’s house.

Am I the only one who likes my banana pudding hot? Like take it out of the fridge and reheat it. Particularly the from scratch custard cooked in oven kind.

Oh, hell yeah!

Given that the AP Stylebook just changed to capitalize Black People, but not white people (decision to be finalized within a month), is The Root reconsidering its stance?

Food and Wine has a very authentic recipe.  From scratch custard.  Tasted like my Mom’s.