Whew Chile, the Ghetto: Geraldo Rivera Comes for Black Fox News Guest’s Hood Pass

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Porn Stache; Black Guy
Porn Stache; Black Guy
Screenshot: YouTube

Geraldo Rivera will forever have the soul of Al Capone’s nationally televised bank vault. The mustached drifter will forever be an empty, vapid windbag who loves him some hot takes washed down with some sound bites.

So if you asked me if I had Rivera checking a Black man’s hood pass on Fox News, aka Republican SpankWire, on my 2021 bingo card, the answer is an overwhelming no. None of us did and yet, here we are suffering from secondhand embarrassment because who are we kidding, Republican OnlyFans is ghetto AF.

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So, Republican BangBus thought it was a good idea to have Geraldo Mustachio and some Black Republican guy with a really whiny voice on to talk about St. Louis’ new crime plan by Mayor-elect Tishaura Jones. See, Jones doesn’t believe that more police is the answer; in fact, she wants to help the city heal by working to ensure that citizens get the help that they need and in turn is banking on that curbing violence. I know, WTH is wrong with Jones? Why would she want to bring in more social workers, drug counselors and require police to undergo mental health evaluations? So you know that this plan is literally killing Republicans’ mood as they only seem to get off when Black folks are being locked up.

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Oh, and to top it all off, Jones, who “won the St. Louis mayoral race on Tuesday night, defeating Alderwoman Cara Spencer and becoming the first Black woman to hold office in the city,” had the niggadacity to claim that white allies are cool, but when it comes to police departments and transforming “their approach to crime, she does not feel white people have the lived experience to lead a majority minority city,” Newsweek reports.

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I hope that my wife will forgive me, but I think I’m falling in love with Jones.

Well this totally got the Black Fox News guest with the weird Black guy military haircut that all Black Fox News guests have, all up in arms. He called Jones’ statement “racist” and that’s when Big Mustache hopped in to ask Black Guy: “When was the last time you were in the ghetto?”

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OK, wait one second.

Mustache and Black Guy, I’m going to need you both to go back to your respective corners while I talk with the judges about whether this question was below the belt.

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A live look at me talking with the judges:

Gif: Giphy
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Niggas, respectfully, have y’all even bothered to look around that Fox newsroom? That place is a shithole. Tucker Carlson is there and he stays losing money. It’s trashy AF. Don’t get me started on the number of baby daddies up in that bitch.

Fox News is ghetto AF.

Meanwhile, it looks like Stache has apologized to Black Guy on Twitter.

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So for at least one more night, the ghetto is safe.