Women are irreplaceable. It’s a simple fact, not an opinion. Without women, there would be no more civilization. That is just a basic argument that is easily defended, but the fact is, women add so much to society that it’s almost impossible to enumerate it all.
Aesthetically, we are what cishet men want in all our many shapes, sizes and forms. This is also a fact. There is nothing like the soft touch of a woman, the way a woman’s curves feel, the wetness inside her or the sound of her moans if you are stroking it right.
So pardon me if I was initially confused, but there was a three-day discussion about sex dolls on Twitter last week. Comedian Ryan Davis made a video in which he discussed them, claiming, “Women are in trouble in 2018”—and the men on Twitter went crazy from there.
Apparently, there are men on the timeline who truly believe that they can fully replace women with these new dolls that look like Instagram models. They had “real” arguments for why the dolls would be a better alternative to real women, and it got me thinking: What kind of man would prefer sex with a doll over sex with a real, live woman?
I thought about it, and then it hit me: The kind of man who would prefer sex with a doll over a real woman is the kind of man who wants sex without the emotional labor that goes along with it. The kind of man who is neither skilled at giving, nor inclined to give, a woman orgasms during sex. The emotionally lazy, emotionally immature, emotionally unintelligent, sexually lazy man who already has a hard time dealing with women over any long period of time in the first place.
That is who wants a sex doll over a real woman.
Now, before the ashen, stay-at-home sons rise from their pallets and come after me like White Walkers, let me make a few points.
One of these scaly bastards made the argument that a man using a sex doll is the same as a woman using a vibrator. That is the biggest false equivalence ever. A woman using a vibrator is the same as a man using a Fleshlight. It’s just a means to an orgasm. We aren’t looking for the vibrator to serve any function other than satisfying our need to get off. A need that a lot of y’all leave us with after sex, if we are being completely honest.
Which brings me to the first point: Show me a man who would prefer sex with a doll over sex with a real woman, and I will show you a man who is ill-equipped when it comes to getting a real woman off.
A doll is not going to tell him that his stroke game is wack. A doll is not going tell him that she hasn’t had an orgasm during any of their sexual encounters. A doll is not going to tell him that he couldn’t find the clit if she Vajazzled it with LED lights.
And ladies, we don’t have to be sad about losing a man like that to a sex doll. He only deserves a sex doll. He doesn’t deserve a real woman because he doesn’t know how to please a real woman, and deep down, he knows it. Let him live that shame with his plastic girlfriend.
The other side of the game is that in addition to being unable to satisfy women sexually, a lot of these men are also unable to satisfy or care for a woman emotionally.
I spoke about emotional intelligence and emotional maturity in a different column, but the gist of it is that a lot of men lack the capacity for an emotionally healthy relationship with a woman.
These are the men we saw speaking out on the timeline claiming that the dolls would be better than a real woman. They feel confident in speaking that loudly and wrongly because they don’t have the range, quite frankly.
These are the same types of men who call it “babysitting” when they are watching their own children, feel that $200 a month in child support is entirely too much money and blame everyone else for their failures in life.
The best part of it all is that they are going to fail their little plastic/silicone girlfriends, too. I mean, think about it: These are the same dudes who cannot be trusted to wipe their asses thoroughly. We are supposed to believe that they are going to clean their splooge out of a doll regularly?
LMAO. Crunchy-sock Twitter doesn’t even sleep on top of sheets, that is why they want these dolls. Life needs to be as low maintenance for them as possible. We should applaud them for showing us their shortcomings so honestly.
They wanted to say that women on the timeline were bitter and upset over the dolls, but no, baby, we are not. Instead, we are wondering how you are going to get the doll to stroke your ever-so-fragile egos.
Good luck, fellas.
We will be discussing sex dolls on our next The Root After Dark Twitter chat, Tuesday at 11 p.m. ET/8 p.m. PT. I will take over The Root’s official Twitter account as always, and we will chop it up. Be sure to follow The Root on Twitter and be a part of the discussion using the hashtag #TheRootAfterDark.