Even for a 2018 filled with tragedy and terror, last week was particularly brutal. There were the assassination attempts on prominent Democrats and critics of the president. A white man shot and killed two black people at a grocery store in Kentucky. That man tried to enter a black church first, but the doors, fortunately, were locked. And then, of course, there was the terrorist attack on the Tree of Life synagogue in Pittsburgh, my home.
Altogether, it seems as if hate and terror are winning. Still, we can not allow ourselves to succumb to it. Because, as we all know, love is a more powerful force than hate. Love, still, is the only way to defeat it. And for those who are feeling a bit disheartened and unsure of how exactly love can vanquish such an evil force, here are 10 ways to ensure that love wins.
1. If hate is at your doorstep, invite it in with love, and offer it a seat on your couch — perhaps even your LOVEseat. Offer it a snack. Then lock the doors so hate can’t leave, excuse yourself to another room, find some accelerant, spray it everywhere, light a match, set your house on fire, and sneak out through the underground tunnel you built specifically for this purpose.
2. Find a Hallmark card that simply says, “I Love You.” Buy 500,000 of them. Have them delivered to the top floor of your office building. When terror is walking down the sidewalk, drop the package of 500,000 “I Love You” cards on hate’s head.
3. Buy a pair of all white Chucks or AF-1s. Spray paint “LOVE” on each side of each shoe. If, during your travels, you happen upon hate, greet it with a smile and your extended hand. Once you have its hand, pull it close for an embrace, then extend your leg to trip it. Once it is laying on the sidewalk, confused by your act, use your Shoe of Love to curb stomp it.
4. Make cupcakes with love. Write “I LOVE YOU” in icing on each. Go to hate’s doorstep. Offer them as a gift in love. Don’t tell them the icing is just frosted and dyed cyanide. Watch, with love, as hate bites into it and convulses.
5. Erect a stage with a microphone and speakers. Sing “Love” by Musiq Soulchild. In fact, contact Musiq Soulchild, and invite him to sing it. When terror jaunts past, put earplugs in, turn the volume up to 250 decibels, and continue the song as terror’s lungs explode.
6. If hate is thirsty, offer it some water, but with love. And then hit hate in the face with a fire hose, spraying scolding hot water of love.
7. If hate approaches you with venom, greet it with a smile; a very white and bright and toothy smile. A very white and bright and toothy smile that reveals the fangs you fastened and sharpened on your teeth last night, and then bite a chunk of flesh out of hate’s neck. (Don’t swallow, though, because that would be mean.)
8. If hate moves into your neighborhood, make it a welcome basket of love—filled with many goodies, candies and smell-good items—and leave it on its porch. When hate leaves the house to retrieve your generous gift, have 500 of your closest and most love-filled friends throw the welcome baskets of love they also made for hate at hate’s face.
9. Take hate on a cruise with you. Call it the “Love Boat” if you wish. Fill hate with the finest cruise foods and duty-free liquors. When hate is happy and full, push hate overboard. Scream “I love you” at it as its eaten by sharks.
10. Plant a tree in an open field. Watch, for years, as it grows and becomes more plentiful and green and abundant. Call it the Tree Of Love. Invite hate to meet you at it, for a conversation. When hate arrives, chop the tree down, and watch it crush hate’s body underneath it. Whisper “I love you” to hate as it takes its last breaths.